restraining myself from typing words that can hurt other people. I am loaded with anger, sadness, as usual, my favourite spot to cry is non other in the bathroom while taking the shower.
i let those tears flow and washed away at the same time.
weird though how can bathroom contribute so much to human civilization, A place where most inspiration emerged from, a place where the undecisive you came out determined, and a place to showcase your vocal without fear of being judge.
anyhow.
I am spending the previous hours thinking about the best words to come out with. God knows how many times i typed a paragraph and leave that space reblank all over again.
How could i not care about you. You're my little sister.
We've spent lots of time together. Not just any time, precious, precious time.
We saw each other grew and mature before our eyes, even in those short period of time.
If you measure our friendship with just us hanging out at places, eating fancy food, crashing into those stores not buying anything
honey, you're wrong
the most vivid memories is the memories of us singing in the car when our jams drop
or we talked for hours in the car not wanting to leave
or we stayed up until it's sahur because it's better to be with you than sleeping (EVERYONE KNOWS HOW MUCH SLEEP MEANS TO ME. and I chose YOU over sleep? like seriously? what are you?)
you know that sense of feeling when you wanted to text someone than you fear that your text will be so disturbing to read
or you tuck yourself to sleep but your eyes wide open thinking what did you do so wrong, the person just dissapear without notice?
and that sense of jealousy seeing the one you love having times of her live with the people she loved and you're not one of them
and how she repeatedly saying she'll keep her circle small, yada yada yada, which simply means you're so much excluded and does not belong to the circle.
maybe I'm just not the coolest person to hang out with
what can I do. I don't have much to offer.
I have this little thing called love, but I guess you've received enough. You won't be needing that from me.
Forgive me if I wasn't trying hard enough. or maybe I've taken you for granted. Wallahi, I am so clueless. wish that I could just burst through your door and ask you what did i do wrong. I don't like texting. I feel like there's so much heart contents missing between those lines. Like I can say I'm crying right now, but I guess you'll never have the idea how ached I truly am at the moment.
wishing you the best for your finals. forgive me if this bothers you.
will be leaving to Scotland next month insyaAllah and Alhamdulillah. part of me dying to tell you, but I'm just afraid it doesn't mean anything to you anymore. but definitely, definitely getting something for you when i get there.
Being human. I make terrible, terrible mistakes wish I could undone. but if I could request something, I did'nt want you to move on. We are not memories. We're making one. But no, we're not done yet. there are such things like unfriend-ing people but not unsister (seriously the term sucks)
keeping you in my dua, always.
because a dua for friends in their absence were the ones that won't be deducted.
Sophie the onni.
i let those tears flow and washed away at the same time.
weird though how can bathroom contribute so much to human civilization, A place where most inspiration emerged from, a place where the undecisive you came out determined, and a place to showcase your vocal without fear of being judge.
anyhow.
I am spending the previous hours thinking about the best words to come out with. God knows how many times i typed a paragraph and leave that space reblank all over again.
How could i not care about you. You're my little sister.
We've spent lots of time together. Not just any time, precious, precious time.
We saw each other grew and mature before our eyes, even in those short period of time.
If you measure our friendship with just us hanging out at places, eating fancy food, crashing into those stores not buying anything
honey, you're wrong
the most vivid memories is the memories of us singing in the car when our jams drop
or we talked for hours in the car not wanting to leave
or we stayed up until it's sahur because it's better to be with you than sleeping (EVERYONE KNOWS HOW MUCH SLEEP MEANS TO ME. and I chose YOU over sleep? like seriously? what are you?)
you know that sense of feeling when you wanted to text someone than you fear that your text will be so disturbing to read
or you tuck yourself to sleep but your eyes wide open thinking what did you do so wrong, the person just dissapear without notice?
and that sense of jealousy seeing the one you love having times of her live with the people she loved and you're not one of them
and how she repeatedly saying she'll keep her circle small, yada yada yada, which simply means you're so much excluded and does not belong to the circle.
maybe I'm just not the coolest person to hang out with
what can I do. I don't have much to offer.
I have this little thing called love, but I guess you've received enough. You won't be needing that from me.
Forgive me if I wasn't trying hard enough. or maybe I've taken you for granted. Wallahi, I am so clueless. wish that I could just burst through your door and ask you what did i do wrong. I don't like texting. I feel like there's so much heart contents missing between those lines. Like I can say I'm crying right now, but I guess you'll never have the idea how ached I truly am at the moment.
wishing you the best for your finals. forgive me if this bothers you.
will be leaving to Scotland next month insyaAllah and Alhamdulillah. part of me dying to tell you, but I'm just afraid it doesn't mean anything to you anymore. but definitely, definitely getting something for you when i get there.
Being human. I make terrible, terrible mistakes wish I could undone. but if I could request something, I did'nt want you to move on. We are not memories. We're making one. But no, we're not done yet. there are such things like unfriend-ing people but not unsister (seriously the term sucks)
keeping you in my dua, always.
because a dua for friends in their absence were the ones that won't be deducted.
Sophie the onni.
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