Maybe when that day comes where all things started to make sense, all the mess started to untangle, I wouldn't be too hard on my past (current) self for feeling so low. I wouldn't want to despise myself or thought that I should do better. Because forgetting is part of our nature, we casually forgets when we are happy. We started to disregard other things because we had it easy. We ridicule and look down at the struggling people and point out their flaws as excuses for the trials that falls on their shoulders. How little did we knew, right.
When the tables turned and I finally understood, I wanted to tell my future self that despite how weak, vulnerable and hopeless I am, I was still able to smile. To put on happy faces, instead of walking around asking for sympathy and empathy. I still find reasons to laugh, to make effort and try to be happy for others even when I didn't know my own ending to this misery.
The Sofwah you know will never be the same anymore. She is scarred. Hopefully for the better, amin.
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