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Happy?

tadi dah ingat nak tulis pasal ape pastu bukak2 suddenly semuanya gone. lesap. tanpa berita.

typical problem.

*tarik nafas. hembus.*

okay,. dah ingat. haha

Lately I was thinking about how my life had turns around. It feels like it's yesterday, tha day that I felt like I'm at the top of the world, and you feel like nothing else matters. the only thing that matters is your happiness.

I've forgot.

I claimed to be happy, in fact I'm suffered.

Suffer from the guilty feeling inside despite had been trying to deny them with your own thought of 'happiness'?
Suffered from the ignorance. trying to pretend that you could'nt care less but the truth is you DO care?

I thought I was happy, but I cried, every week. sometimes everyday. even to the extend, that my eyes got swollen for crying the whole night. I am addicted, I know. But it just so hard to stop. because I am AFRAID.

(ni bukan addict dadah ke ape. haha)

I THOUGHT, that's the price that I had to pay for the so called 'HAPPINESS'

sometimes, I am alone. I thought I am SAD?
but when I looked back, when I tried to remember, I tried to imagine, I'm amazed

I've deceived, with the term of happiness :)

what is the use, of the thought of happiness, when it is not worth your tears?

This is the REAL happiness, that many people, even me, myself had forgotten

and I thank Allah for realizing me this fact. for keeping me cheered up. for not making anything will disrupt my eating apetite :P

Sofwah Hayati. I believed nothing suits this name else than a happy life. hehe

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how could I'm not being happy, when Allah creates miracle after miracle, in my own life? :)

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