You know that feeling, as we grew older, things are started to make senses sometimes?
Like a whole clutter of baju suddenly make their own way to the wardrobe arranged neatly on a specific order?
like we finally understand why some people took some the most unlikely decision?
or why some people act indecently despite knowing its consequences.
yeah.
I got a hit (that's what I'm calling in now. Cuti gave me a lot of free time so The Mentalist marathon filled my hit with cop-fbi kind of vocab) it's more like an enlightenment actually.
Remember one Hadith of Prophet Muhammad saying that seorang yang berjaya mendidik anak perempuan, mendapat keistimewaan di sisi Baginda?
I figured out the hardest part of raising a daughter, is the most important thing that makes one girl vulnerable. Its giving adequate attention. Girls grew up needing attention.
That's a fact no girl can deny, no matter how independent she might seemed to be.
It's not like a negative attitude that comes with the gender, one might says its probably the downside attribute, but truly, it makes a girl more sensible, more feminine, and most importantly, more whole and contented.
And the tricky part is to set the right baseline or parameter of the 'amount' of attention given
If it's too much, your girl will grew up showered with attention, thinking that would be her baseline of happiness, if one day she realised that the spotlight does not necessarily belongs to her, or the world does not revolve around her, she'll collapse. or she might end up doing things without a long thoughts on the consequences.
We all knew what happen when a girl grew with minimal of least attention given.
She'll grew up finding the way to fill the blank spaces inside, and sometimes, a wrong person at the wrong time, just lead to another series of breakdown.
Since every person has different personalities, tendencies, favouritism and needs, so takboleh guna kaedah pukul rata pada semua.We always thought about the challenges mostly come in the form of financial, morality, education, religion, when sometimes, it might even goes deep one to a basic human need.
And honestly as a girl, it's always the littlest thing that we tend to underrate that actually makes A WIDE GAP OF DIFFERENCES.
1. Compliment her when she done something good, or at least on her effort even the results might be underwhelming. Compliment her cooking, her look, how good she is at mengemas and all those things that she pours her efforts to. (We all have that one friend that we loved for always complimenting apa yang kita pandai buat, walaupun taklah hebat mana pun)
2. Thanking her for things she done. thank her for the lovely cup of tea.
Congratulates her on her achievement. EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. when she achieved good results even though you knew she'll always excel. or even the slightest rise of pointer when you knew she worked hard for it. or when she finally learn how to do stuffs on her computer on her own.
Like a whole clutter of baju suddenly make their own way to the wardrobe arranged neatly on a specific order?
like we finally understand why some people took some the most unlikely decision?
or why some people act indecently despite knowing its consequences.
yeah.
I got a hit (that's what I'm calling in now. Cuti gave me a lot of free time so The Mentalist marathon filled my hit with cop-fbi kind of vocab) it's more like an enlightenment actually.
Remember one Hadith of Prophet Muhammad saying that seorang yang berjaya mendidik anak perempuan, mendapat keistimewaan di sisi Baginda?
I figured out the hardest part of raising a daughter, is the most important thing that makes one girl vulnerable. Its giving adequate attention. Girls grew up needing attention.
That's a fact no girl can deny, no matter how independent she might seemed to be.
It's not like a negative attitude that comes with the gender, one might says its probably the downside attribute, but truly, it makes a girl more sensible, more feminine, and most importantly, more whole and contented.
And the tricky part is to set the right baseline or parameter of the 'amount' of attention given
If it's too much, your girl will grew up showered with attention, thinking that would be her baseline of happiness, if one day she realised that the spotlight does not necessarily belongs to her, or the world does not revolve around her, she'll collapse. or she might end up doing things without a long thoughts on the consequences.
We all knew what happen when a girl grew with minimal of least attention given.
She'll grew up finding the way to fill the blank spaces inside, and sometimes, a wrong person at the wrong time, just lead to another series of breakdown.
Since every person has different personalities, tendencies, favouritism and needs, so takboleh guna kaedah pukul rata pada semua.We always thought about the challenges mostly come in the form of financial, morality, education, religion, when sometimes, it might even goes deep one to a basic human need.
And honestly as a girl, it's always the littlest thing that we tend to underrate that actually makes A WIDE GAP OF DIFFERENCES.
1. Compliment her when she done something good, or at least on her effort even the results might be underwhelming. Compliment her cooking, her look, how good she is at mengemas and all those things that she pours her efforts to. (We all have that one friend that we loved for always complimenting apa yang kita pandai buat, walaupun taklah hebat mana pun)
2. Thanking her for things she done. thank her for the lovely cup of tea.
Congratulates her on her achievement. EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. when she achieved good results even though you knew she'll always excel. or even the slightest rise of pointer when you knew she worked hard for it. or when she finally learn how to do stuffs on her computer on her own.
3. PATIENCE. patience when you teach her how to use technologies. how to handle technical things. when she messed something up. when she ALWAYS FORGET. when she ask you endless and repetitive questions.
4. This is the hard part, but the word sorry is the magic work sometimes. It doesnt come naturally. You have to work on it (I had to admit I have this ego problem, quite disturbingly, frankly speaking. I find its hard to admit my fault even though I knew it is). Nobody want to live feeding our ego, so why wait to start?
these are the list I made on ideal situation, which in real life, maybe it does not happen as frequently as we expect to be.
but truly, we can always learn.
if you found a close-to-imperfection being that can fulfill all above, than we are more than lucky to have such a lively example that we can follow.
or, if we don't, find one, we can always be the man/woman of change.
(yes, THIS APPLIES TO BOTH MAN AND WOMEN)
oh and on the other note, i have been admiring this korean reality show called The Return of Superman. not just about admiring cute babies, but also the great parenting reflected on the actions and words of kids. They were just, EXEMPLARY.
This part gets me teary wet :'( this is an 8years old girl name Lee Jaeah (first out of five siblings) asked questions regarding a teary incident with her dad. She lost to her dad on a tennis game and she cried her heart out because she worked so hard but she did'nt get better.
Her father, Lee Dong Gook (a national football player), instead of pampering her, asked her strictly why she cried, and only after he encouraged his kid to not to give up on being the best tennis player in the world, he told her to come and he gave her a big hug.
"Did'nt it bothers you to see your daughter cried like that?"
"Of course it hurts, but it's better for her to cry now. She'll have more happy moments in the future"
:')
Parenting level: KOREANS
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